Tea Party

Agenda 21: First, they came for the light bulbs

Agenda 21: First, they came for the light bulbs

Remember when threats of a global government were symbolized by black helicopters and implied by the phrase “New World Order.” They’re so 20th century, it turns out: these days, the phrase “Agenda 21″ and compact fluorescent light bulbs are the new signs of “They’re coming to get you.”

Agenda 21 – it does sound a little spooky. You might think of it as a plan for world domination cooked up by a cabal of wealthy evildoers in a dark backroom. In truth, it’s much more innocuous: Agenda 21 is the title of a non-binding plan released at the 1992 Conference on Environment and Development in Rio. No secrets or backrooms here: Agenda 21 even has its own UN website.

A GOP glossary

A GOP glossary

Our friend Geoff Rice, a nimble Facebook poster and hilarious bleeding-heart liberal, recently began a GOP/Tea Party glossary in public “Note” form, defining such terms as “freedom”, “immigrant” and “socialism”, and calling for additional entries from readers. Here was our contribution:
Pro-Life

A belief in and dedication to the sanctity of life, except in the cases of women who might die from childbirth, prisoners on death row (even those with new evidence that may exonerate them), animals who are hunted for sport or tortured on factory farms, poor people who can’t afford healthcare, and doctors who legally perform abortions (see “George Tiller”).
The ability to believe that God creates all life at conception while simultaneously ignoring the fact that (when you consider the number of miscarriages women go through) God is the biggest abortionist of them all.

Nobody actually works in LA

Nobody actually works in LA

No one works, they just create traffic jams. (Photo from RESPRES’ Flickr.)
OOOf. It has been a while. My bad. Truly. I was off in New Orleans hanging with hunky Bayou Boys for a story on BP and the conmen living on Flotels for AOL… Then went to LA to hang with my sisters and tape the voicing for the animation on my MTV show, Grits. LA is so funny. Everyone either thinks I’m going to move there or have already moved there. Which is weird as LA is like my personal purgatory. You try finding someone in that town who isn’t a “producer” (scam artist), “model” (pretty girl with no job), “actress” (hooker), or “realtor” (see model). It’s pretty damn hard. What other city has traffic jams at 3 pm on a Tuesday? No one actually works there! (Says me, typing that shit in and noting the irony).

Fun Facts from a Certified Cynic

Fun Facts from a Certified Cynic

U.S. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas (left). Justice nominees should henceforth be determined on how well their poker face holds when boredom ensues. (Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images) Aha! So finally Mercury got the hell out of retrograde — and miraculously all my phones, tv, electronica and communications issues were solved! Seriously. I was having…

Tea Party crashers!

Tea Party crashers!

If Jason Levin’s plan is successful, the Tea Party just got a bit wilder with some uninvited party crashers at their rallies and protests. Levin, an Oregon technology consultant, is spearheading the “Crash the Tea Party” movement which is encouraging people to join the tea party’s public gatherings where they’ll be indistinguishable except for one…

Protest signs: sad or funny?

Protest signs: sad or funny?

As health care reform is debated in the Congress and the media, more and more protesters are taking to the streets. From town hall meetings to last week’s Tea Party march on Washington, anti-Obama protests are gaining in number and occurrence. While I am thankful that this country promotes free thought and encourages and protects…