Political deep throats

Article: Political deep throats

For a Republican presidential candidate to be taken seriously they must go through the time honored tradition of becoming a meme via the consumption of food in a phallic manner. This means it’s time to finally pay attention to Rick Santorum (see photo above) as difficult as it may be. He now joins a rarefied group that includes Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann who were both unified into this unholy gif-union that you can’t unsee (although Mitt finds it hilarious):

What politicians are really saying

Article: What politicians are really saying

Just when Mitt Romney thinks he finally bested Santorum and sent him off packing to a dark hole, but like a bad itch that Romney just can’t seem to get rid of, Santorum keeps coming back as evident by his wins on Tuesday last week in the GOP presidential primaries in Minnesota, Missouri, and Colorado (Romeny won Florida and Nevada). And recently according to two national polls (here’s the boilerplate caveat about the reliability of polls blah blah blah) Santorum has pulled even with Romney. The downside to Santorum’s ongoing popularity is that it reminds me that there are people that actually agree with his odious social policy agenda and beliefs. The upside is that his relevance provides material for the comedic corners of the blogosphere. Among my favorites comes from the funny lip-dubbing people at Bad Lip Reading. They’re so bad that they’re so good. Like the video above of Santorum, these geniuses add their own carefully synched but gibberish speech to various national politicians’ political ads (here is Romney’s). Oddly enough, the gobbledygook words make more sense to me than some of the originals.

GOP candidates summarized in hand signals

Article: GOP candidates summarized in hand signals

BuzzFeed (going increasingly political with their recent hiring of Ben Smith from Politico) has a hilarious photo recap of the recent GOP debates that’s focused on simply their hand gestures. My favorite is the one above of Romney displaying the “He Was THIS Tall” expression.

The Ricks: Santorum's boy toys & Perry's customary greeting

Article: The Ricks: Santorum's boy toys & Perry's customary greeting

Image credit: Gage Skidmore

Like any good reality show, the 2012 republican primary race is riddled with hypocritical and anachronistic characters that couldn’t be more entertaining if they were scripted. What makes them so buzz worthy is that they believe in a lot of the rhetoric they’re dishing out. But what’s even more mind blowing is they’re really speaking on behalf of their constituents, who in turn will defend the candidate. So color me, and my log cabin, crazy because I recently found out that Rick Santorum has gay men coming to his defense. I don’t really have a log cabin, it was just the obvious reference, but apparently Rick Santorum might.

The frothiest comments on Iowa GOP results

Article: The frothiest comments on Iowa GOP results

The big political news in the States this morning is Rick Santorum’s resurgence in the GOP race (otherwise known as the hilarious new reality show The Amazing GOP Race) with his nearly come from behind upset over Mitt Romney, which may please the Santorum campaign and supporters (did they celebrate with some orders of Santorum salad?), but it sure freaked everybody else out. At least it made the Internet gleeful for all the NSFW pun opportunities. It’s not a big secret that the number one return when you Google search “Santorum” is an explicit sexual definition, which was payback initiated by columnist Dan Savage following the senator’s hateful comments on homosexuality. Here are some of the best comments I’ve seen so far this morning from various corners of the Internet and friends on the Iowa GOP nomination results:

A GOP glossary

Article: A GOP glossary

Our friend Geoff Rice, a nimble Facebook poster and hilarious bleeding-heart liberal, recently began a GOP/Tea Party glossary in public “Note” form, defining such terms as “freedom”, “immigrant” and “socialism”, and calling for additional entries from readers. Here was our contribution:

A belief in and dedication to the sanctity of life, except in the cases of women who might die from childbirth, prisoners on death row (even those with new evidence that may exonerate them), animals who are hunted for sport or tortured on factory farms, poor people who can’t afford healthcare, and doctors who legally perform abortions (see “George Tiller”).
The ability to believe that God creates all life at conception while simultaneously ignoring the fact that (when you consider the number of miscarriages women go through) God is the biggest abortionist of them all.

Bill Maher for President

Article: Bill Maher for President

On Facebook this week, during you know, the times the site was not down, I wrote the status update “Bill Maher should be president.” I don’t think I’d ever gotten as many “likes” as I did with this post. It got me thinking about Maher. He’s in the group of comedians turned political voices, that includes the intentional comics (Colbert, Stewart) and the unintentional comics (Beck, Coulter). But he’s better than them. He’s never acting. He just tells it like it is.