It’s not exactly breaking news that people lie like rugs in their online dating profiles. “Recent” photos are a couple years (at least) out of date; the weight someone lists is kind of like that pair of jeans they keep around, hoping they’ll fit again; and the height listed would probably be accurate if the person was standing on a box, like Tom Cruise in his wedding photos.
We really should have some kind of back-stabbing, cat-fighting (or at least pillow-fighting) relationship with Erin Bradley — author of the new book Every Rose Has Its Thorn: The Rock ‘n’ Roll Field Guide to Guys — seeing as she picked up where we left off at Nerve.com. She’s been their advice lady now for five years. But we’re bigger people than that. Okay, we’re not, but she’s really sweet and very funny and gives solid advice — what’s not to like?
The book examines ten different types of guys, based on rock stars you know and love-slash-hate, as a means of giving straight women advice about their dating and sex lives. In other words, there’s a lot to be learned from trying to figure out if Morrissey would make a better boyfriend or booty call. If we were to judge a book by its cover, we’d never have picked this one up. But fortunately we’re not that superficial (and fortunately it’s much cooler-looking inside). Here are some of our favorite quotes about the ten different types covered in the book:
Melissa, Sue (in a Charlize Theron inspired homemade outfit), Joan Rivers and me at Seder
So I had to make (yet another) trip back to Cali last week. But the good news is: it was totally disgusting in NYC and LA was sunny and fab! So there, take that, jet lag! And Karl was cool with it because he got to go. He only farted like twice on the plane, but at least he didn’t release the goods — you know, till he got outside. But hey — who am I to judge High Altitude Flatulence?
This time I was out there to shoot a pilot… vaguely along the lines of “speaking truth” — see last week’s blog — although not to Foxxy Brown — pretty much everyone else though. But I still can’t get over Foxxy. Heh. So while I was out there I chilled with my lil’ sis Emily and my big sister Sophie for a night — before heading to (YES THAT’S RIGHT!) Joan Rivers’ house for Passover! O hell yes!!!
We love to browse the “trending topics” at Twitter to see what people are tweeting about across the world. Where else can you get relationship wisdom from millions of people simultaneously? Our most recent favorite topic is the hash tag #YouAintForMe. Here are twenty recent ones for your edification — though we guarantee that by the time this post goes live, a few more thousand will have been tweeted. (By the way, you can follow us here on Twitter.)
MiszMaddy: if you tried to get at my bestie, #youAinTForMe
BenedicteCakes: skinny jeans? #YouAintForMe
jt_makemoves: #youaintforme if you cant play the faithful part…no time for infidelity
Enjoy these scanned images of an anachronistic dating guide from 1938 instructing women on how to behave in order to get a man to put a ring on it. It includes gems such as: Don’t drink too much, as a man expects you to keep your dignity all evening. Drinking may make some girls seem…