Em And Lo

Em & Lo are the Emily Posts of the modern bedroom. They\'ve co-authored six books on the topics of sex and love: their most recent, Sex: How to Do Everything; three A-Z guides, Buh Bye, Rec Sex and Sex Toy; the sex manual The Big Bang: Nerve\'s Guide to the New Sexual Universe; and the handbook Sex Etiquette for Ladies and Gentlemen. They\'ve contributed to numerous publications, including recurring columns for New York magazine, The Guardian (UK), Men’s Journal, and More (U.K.). They were also the hosts of a ten-episode television series called “SEX: How to Do Everything” airing on Fiver in the UK in early 2009. They currently dish about all things love- and sex-related at EMandLO.com.

Top 10 girls who pushed back

Article: Top 10 girls who pushed back

Inspired by the new docu-series PUSH GIRLS, which features four outspoken women rollin’ large, we decided to write about ten women under 40 who push back in their own way. To help us narrow down the list (and not totally lose our minds), we kept it contemporary, which is why you won’t find Joan of Arc, Anne Frank or Rosa Parks below. Even so, it was near impossible to choose just ten young women who embody empowerment. Who else should have been on this list? Let us know in the comments section!

Em & Lo on The Interview Show

Article: Em & Lo on The Interview Show

Yep, we just referred to ourselves in the third person…again. Remember a few weeks ago we told you we were going to be on The Interview Show in Brooklyn? No? Well, here’s the video of us on Chicago comedian and humor columnist Mark Bazer’s show anyway. We thought he was going to be asking us things like “What’s the weirdest advice question you’ve ever gotten?” or “What’s the best/worst thing about writing about sex?” You know, the fun cocktail conversations we never seem to have in real life. Instead, Mark asked us real, honest-to-God sex advice questions. The nerve! It was like work, except without the benefit of us being able to pick and choose the questions we want to answer and spending hours polishing our responses to make ourselves seem effortlessly witty. The veil has been lifted:

Naked news: the weird and wacky edition

Article: Naked news: the weird and wacky edition

Not all news has to have gravitas. Not after this week’s zombie apocolypse. Sometimes the weird, the wacky, the big wastes of time are just what you need to start the weekend right:

Top 10 gay sex scenes in mainstream movies

Article: Top 10 gay sex scenes in mainstream movies

Thanks to the Hays Code, gay characters were largely missing from the movies up until 1968. And even more recently than that, it was considered career suicide for a male actor to “play gay.” These days, it’s not hard to find gay characters in mainstream Hollywood films — the gay best friend has become a rom-com staple. But the gay side kick, as Hollywood portrays him, tends to be much more interested in shopping and gossiping with his straight female friends than in having sex.

We wish we lived in a world where people sent these cards

Article: We wish we lived in a world where people sent these cards

“Where would be without romance?” writes the blogger responsible for the awesome (and free!) e-card site WrongCards.com. “Probably living less dramatic lives with more compatible people and much more realistic expectations.” If that sounds like the kind of guy you want writing your greeting cards, then you need to check out his site. The romance section is our favorite, and it exists, they say, because “when people start to get themselves into a romantic mood, all good judgment evaporates. And that’s where we come in.” Sure, the whole site is kind of a joke, and the majority of the cards aren’t really ever ended to be sent (except in jest). But many a truth is told in jest, as everyone — and especially sex advice writers —  know. In these hilarious, kinky, weird, and freaky cards, you’ll find more honesty, sincerity, and passion than in an entire warehouse of the Hallmark variety. If only we were all truly able to communicate like this in relationships, the two of us would be out of a job. Here are a few of our faves:

A sex toy sitcom

Article: A sex toy sitcom

Okay, this is the weirdest thing we’ve come across in a while: a low-budget, home-made, episodic sitcom about a family of sex toys.

The best commencement speech of 2012

Article: The best commencement speech of 2012

Commencement season is wrapping up and everyone’s coming out with their “Best Commencement Speeches of 2012″ lists — all with the usual suspects, of course: Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Mitt Romney, Michael Bloomberg, Brian Williams, Katie Couric, Oprah Winfrey…yeah, yeah, yeah, a few jokes, some heartfelt platitudes, lots of security. Yawn. But our hands-down absolute favorite of 2012 — and one you won’t find on most of these lists — is comedian Eugene Mirman speaking at his old alma mater Hampshire College, that flaming-liberal-hipster college that let’s you make up your own major. He chose to major in comedy. This speech proves it actually worked. And how can you not adore a keynote commencement address that includes the phrase “fuck that”?

Naked News: Same-sex marriage wins over X-Men but not Catholics

Article: Naked News: Same-sex marriage wins over X-Men but not Catholics

This week, support for same-sex marriage hits an all-time high in the U.S., with even Colin Powell and the X-Men getting on board! But it’s going to take more than a sort-of vow by Angelina and Brad to get the rest of the country on board.

How to improve phone sex without saying a thing

Article: How to improve phone sex without saying a thing

We’re frequently asked by readers how they can get into phone sex. They tell us that they don’t know what to say, or how to say it, or how to initiate it — but most of all, they tell us that it just feels so strange and silly and isolated to be sitting there with your iPhone for company, not sure if the person on the other end of the phone is checking their email and and half-listening you while you moan and dirty talk your little heart out. (We suppose that’s what Skype is for? But if you can handle Skype-sex then you’re a braver human being than either of us.)

Just how stupid is that homophobic pastor's plan to round up the gays?

Article: Just how stupid is that homophobic pastor's plan to round up the gays?

This video of a North Carolinian pastor spewing homophobic hate has been making the rounds. Made “pukin’ sick” by the thought of men kissing men, Pastor Charles Worley comes up with a big idea to get rid of homosexuality once and for all — a “final solution,” if you will:
Build a great big large fence, 150 or 100 miles long. Put all the lesbians in there. Fly over and drop some food. Do the same thing with the queers and the homosexuals. Have that fence electrified so they can’t get out. Feed ‘em, and– And you know what? In a few years they’ll die out. You know why? They can’t reproduce.

How to spot a hipster in the bedroom

Article: How to spot a hipster in the bedroom

Last week we wrote about how to spot a hipster in the wild. Inspired by that, we decided to put together our own guide to spotting hipsters… in the bedroom. Here are our top twenty ways to know you’re having sex with a hipster.

Lelo's short film of vibrators at Cannes

Article: Lelo's short film of vibrators at Cannes

The Cannes Film Festival is in full swing right now (May 16-27) and one of its special guests is one of our favorite pleasure-object producers: the high end Swedish design company, Lelo. They’re screening their very own short — okay, it’s a crummy commercial. But as with everything Lelo does, it’s beautiful, sleek, glamourous, luxurious and inviting — like their toys (although we never will get the appeal of squirming around on a bed of roses).

Naked news: "mankini" to be worn during Olympics Opening Ceremony?

Article: Naked news: "mankini" to be worn during Olympics Opening Ceremony?

This week, homophobia is down, gaydar is up, female objectification is over the top, and home HIV tests are around the corner. Oh, and a mankini is on the way:

How to spot a hipster in the wild

Article: How to spot a hipster in the wild

How is it possible that hipsters have been around since the 1940s? (At least according to the OED, which equates the word with “hepcat.” Er, thanks for that.) Even stranger still, how is it possible that hipsters have been around since the 1940s and we still can’t exactly put our finger on what one is? In recent years the hipster even became a subject for academic (or at least highbrow) debate, with the fancy-pants journal n+1 sponsoring an entire symposium called “What Was the Hipster?” which became a book by the same name. Unfortunately we suspect the folks at n+1 of being hipsters in denial, which is why we can’t bear to read their book on the topic.

Online dating's fatal flaws

Article: Online dating's fatal flaws

Researchers recently published a book-length article in the journal Psychological Science in the Public Interest on the scientific flaws of online dating. They wrote a layperson’s summary for Scientific American, but even that was three pages long (practically an eternity in internet time). So here’s what you need to know in a nutshell:

Phrase of the week: sex nerd

Article: Phrase of the week: sex nerd

We pride ourselves on knowing all the sex lingo — and where there isn’t lingo for something we’ve observed in the world of sex and dating, then we make it up ourselves. For example, three terms we coined in our book Rec Sex: An A-Z Guide to Casual Sex are benched (the state of being…

Naked News: Obama makes us proud, North Carolina, not so much

Article: Naked News: Obama makes us proud, North Carolina, not so much

It’s all gay news all the time this week — there’s some good news, some bad news, and some plain old ugly news. As Marc Maron tweeted, NC = Nation’s Closet.

Rock the slut vote

Article: Rock the slut vote

It’s not the slickest website, but we love the idea of RockTheSlutVote.com — embracing the insult that’s meant to dismiss, discredit and silence “uppity” women in order to increase voter turn-out for political candidates who respect women’s rights. Yes, the art-work is cheesy (stock illustrations of impossibly thin, pretty, sexy fashionistas all apparently wearing miracle bras for the most part — we guess they’re trying to project the slutty stereotype???); and yes, it could all just be a cover to sell poorly designed CafePress merch (their logo is a cheesy lipstick imprint, ugh); but it does make it fairly easy to get registered to vote. Plus, we love the list that rips off the “You might be a red neck if…” format on their homepage — here’s a sample:

Top 10 transgender films

Article: Top 10 transgender films

In honor of TRANSGENERATION airing Tuesdays at 10p on Sundance Channel, we wanted to curate a screening list of the best transgender-themed flicks out there. In order to make our list, the films in question had to feature a sympathetic portrayal of a transgendered character in a leading role — hence PSYCHO and SILENCE OF THE LAMBS did not make the cut. No, the following films are all thoughtful, moving depictions of people struggling through life — people who are human first, transgendered second.

Pickup artist training will make you feel bad about yourself

Article: Pickup artist training will make you feel bad about yourself

Here’s the dirty little secret of pickup artist training: it actually works (for both men and women), but it may well make you feel like shit about yourself. Maybe you don’t care. Maybe you just want the digits. But just in case you want to get laid and feel like a better person, you might be interested in the results of an academic study on the topic. A PhD student in Mainz, Germany, trained 17 men and 23 women in the pickup and flirtation arts — specifically, how to apply evolutionary psychology principles to the pickup scene, how to make body language work for you (lots of touching), and how to combat anxiety. He then sent his students into the wild, with the men instructed to gather digits and the women instructed to gather drinks invitations. The before-and-after stats showed that men went, on average, from 1.07 phone numbers to 3.67 per hour, while women’s drink-invite average went from 1.65 to 3.1.

Check out these top sex, love and dating blogs

Article: Check out these top sex, love and dating blogs

Last week, GetSTDtested.com released their list of the Top 100 Sex&Love&Dating Blogs, and our little ol’ humble home site EMandLO.com not only made the top 10, we were ranked third! (Excuse us while we do The Running Man.) Only OkCupid’s OkTrends(#1) and EmpowHER.com (#2) beat us out. Now, we know this was just a clever…

Top 10 pickup lines for 2012

Article: Top 10 pickup lines for 2012

Most of the contributions to the recent Twitter hashtag #2012PickUpLines were pretty uninspiring. (Exhibit A: “I’d like to buy a new router for you and your friend. And ‘Route Her’ and yourself into my bedroom tonight.” Er, okay, Beavis.) But we were inspired by Rainn Wilson (@rainnwilson) of THE OFFICE, who tweeted, “Can I piggy-back on your WiFi?” Okay, we didn’t exactly pee our pants laughing, but something about imagining Dwight delivering that line worked for us. So here are our best attempts at 2012 pickup lines:

Naked News: Whose bright idea was a Hooters in Park Slope anyway?

Article: Naked News: Whose bright idea was a Hooters in Park Slope anyway?

Having a bad day? Don’t worry, this week the news is light and airy: panda inseminations, professional mermaids, Hooters Heismans and creepy cuddle phones, yippee!

Apparently, your dating success depends on how you use pronouns. Funny, we thought it ha to do with appearance, hygiene, education and sense of humor.
In no duh news: Park Slope says no to a Hooters.

This is what feminist porn looks like

Article: This is what feminist porn looks like

Readers are constantly writing to us for advice on the Porn Issue in their relationship. Typically, women write in to say, “Why is my boyfriend so into porn and how can I get him to stop?” And typically, men write in to say, “Why does my girlfriend have such a problem with me watching porn?” Less often, a woman will say, “How can I find porn that doesn’t annoy me or make me laugh so hard I snort my soda or enrage my inner feminist?” And a guy might ask, “How can I find porn that my girlfriend will enjoy watching with me?” To all of these people we say — amongst other things — find better porn. Of course, “better” is fairly subjective, but anything advertising itself as “feminist porn” is a good step in the right direction. And guys, before you roll your eyes and assume that feminist porn just means a lot of hand-holding and meaningful eye contact, think again.