Calling Mad Scientists: Top 10 Movie Inventions We Wish Were Real
If self-lacing shoes and and breakfast machines actually existed, our world would be a much better place! Here’s to high hopes that some scientist gets on the following creations stat.
1. Self-lacing Shoes/Hoverboard (Back to the Future)
It would have been too damn obvious to say we wished that the flux capacitor were real. Of course we do. But let’s slow down for a second and start small. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just have some shoes that tied themselves and a hoverboard to ride on? The technology for both of those things has to exist already, but not available to the masses just quite yet. Nike has already patented a design for an autolacing shoe, so one can only hope we’ll see them on shelves soon. And a California couple has launched a Kickstarter so that you too could have your own hoverboard. Looks like 2015 is going to be a pretty good year.
2. Electro-Magnetic Shrink Ray (Honey, I Shrunk the Kids)
Oh, the hilarity of turning your kids into near-invisible shrunken versions of themselves! An oft-utilized invention in the movies, the shrink ray is a tool that one we’ve all hoped and dreamed would be real by now. We could all be riding around on dogs and swimming in a pool of cereal milk if only science would advance a little faster.
3. Inception (Inception)
The scene in Inception where Ellen Page’s little collegiate character turns Paris into a giant, insane upside-down land is exactly why the act of inception needs to be real. It could be argued that the snowed-out scene in Cillian Murphy’s fortress-like third-level mind serves to prove that inception maybe shouldn’t be real. Either way, it would be awesome, if only for a short while, to mess with somebody’s brain while they slept really deeply.
4. Neuralizer (Men In Black)
Have you ever said something that you immediately regretted saying? Or perhaps you’ve made a huge mistake? Better still, are there aliens running amok and you want to make sure no one finds out? This is precisely why the neuralizer from Men In Black needs to exist in real life.
5. Breakfast Machine (Pee-wee’s Big Adventure)
It goes without saying that breakfast is the best meal of the day. Dinner and lunch are great, but breakfast can consist of everything from pancakes to omelets to French toast, so it automatically wins all. Given that information, it’s easy to see why Pee-wee Herman has it made in the shade: In Pee-wee’s Big Adventure, a machine makes breakfast for him! It’s what everyone’s wildest dreams are made of.
6. The Cross Joint (Pineapple Express)
Okay, so this could probably exist. After some basic Google searches, you would be stunned to see that stoners are far more industrious than you’d initially expect. In fact, it seems like the phenomenon of the cross joint goes far back, much further back than even Pineapple Express, like a Tolkien legend that never was. However, what we’d really like to see exist is not just any cross joint, but the cross joint rolled by the hands of James Franco. The high from that joint might turn us into triple-PhD students/soap opera actors/authors/installation artists, as well.
7. Flying Taxi Cab (The Fifth Element)
The world created for The Fifth Element looks generally like a place where none of us would like to live, especially those of us who are claustrophobic. However, for all city-dwellers out there, it certainly would be nice to get a ride in a flying taxi once and a while. Think of the possibilities. You’re trying to impress your date, it’s raining, and every cab is taken. All of a sudden, Bruce Willis flies down to street level in his magical flying taxi and you get swept away with the woman of your dreams.
8. The Grid (Tron)
If you went to the world’s coolest week-long rave, it wouldn’t be nearly as cool as spending even one hour just chilling on the grid, particularly if that one hour was spent in the company of Michael Sheen and Daft Punk.
Even if its existence and its purpose are still unclear to the less science-minded types, we are amused thing about what it’d be like to go bowling, or play Twister, or have a friendly neighborhood barbecue on the grid.
9. Knit-O-Matic (Wallace and Gromit’s A Close Shave)
While nearly every invention of Wallace’s ultimately fails and turns evil on him, it still doesn’t stop us from wanting to see some of them created in reality. The feature invention of A Close Shave is the Knit-O-Matic, a machine in which you insert a sheep (yes, a sheep) and through a number of steps, out comes a sweater and an unharmed, yet unadorned, sheep. There would be nothing more amazing on cold winter nights than having a sweater knitted for you from scratch.
10. Every single invention (Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory)
Watching the original Charlie and the Chocolate Factory for the first time brings up a lot of thoughts when you’re a kid. Though a portion of those thoughts have to do with why Gene Wilder is so funny-looking, most of them are in regards to whether or not all the great stuff in the movie is real. While we’re aware of the consequences of a three-course meal made only of bubblegum, we sure wouldn’t mind have a taste of a fizzy lifting drink or a sample of Wonka’s lickable wallpaper.
Want to indulge in more wishful thinking? Here are 10 TV characters we wish we could bring back from the dead.