Top 10 sexiest scenes directed by Tony Scott

British-born Hollywood director Tony Scott (brother of fellow filmmaker Ridley) died this past Sunday when he jumped from a bridge in Los Angeles. We didn’t know the man so we can remember him only through some of our favorite moments that he directed on the screen (well, at least, our favorite sex-related moments)…

10. The best-ever euphemism for a topping male sex partner: wingman. As in Iceman (Val Kilmer) saying, “You can be my wingman any time.” And Maverick (Tom Cruise) replying, “Bullshit! You can be mine.” From, of course, TOP GUN (1983).

9. Tony Scott worked frequently with Denzel Washington, and though he mostly directed him in action scenes (as opposed to love scenes), Washington’s tough guys oozed sex appeal in Scott’s movies. (So much so that we, two grown women and mothers of two small children each, are forced to use phrases like “oozed sex appeal.” Apologies, dear readers.) Like in DEJA VU (2006), when a bad guy (played by Jim Caviezel) tells Washington, ”You better have some divine intervention, buddy. You’re gonna need it.” And Washington replies, “You better have some KY. You’re gonna need it.” Talk about a MAN ON FIRE (2004… another movie in which Scott directed Washington).

8. “I had to come all the way from the highway and byways of Tallahassee, Florida, to Motor City, Detroit, to find my true love. If you gave me a million years to ponder, I would never have guessed that true romance and Detroit would ever go together. And till this day, the events that followed all still seems like a distant dream. But the dream was real and was to change our lives forever. I kept asking Clarence why our world seemed to be collapsing and things seemed to be getting so shitty. And he’d say, ‘That’s the way it goes, but don’t forget, it goes the other way too.’ That’s the way romance is… Usually, that’s the way it goes, but every once in a while, it goes the other way too.” –A prostitute named Alabama (Patricia Arquette) talking about her husband, Clarence (Christian Slater), in TRUE ROMANCE (1993), directed by Tony Scott and written by Quentin Tarantino.

7. When hotshot stock-car driver Cole (Tom Cruise) mistakes his new doctor Claire (Nicole Kidman) for a stripper in DAYS OF THUNDER (1990). Not because she’s wearing stripper shoes, but because his colleagues had previously sent him a stripper dressed as a cop who “pats him down,” notices his erection, and says, “Looks like we found something… A concealed weapon.” We should note that the script is excruciating: Cole later tells Claire, “I’m more afraid of bein’ nothing than I am of bein’ hurt.” And at another point, she tells him, “Boy, you’re very quick,” to which he replies — of course he does — “You oughta see me drive.” (Cruise himself is credited as one of the screenwriters, which tells you everything you need to know. And Tony Scott once said that they started filming without a script: They were basically told to put Cruise in a fast car and they’d make a fast buck.) Despite all that, though, we kind of love the chemistry between Cruise and Kidman — this is the movie where they met. Oh, how we miss ’80s/early-’90s Cruise.

6. “I eat the pussy, I eat the butt, I eat every motherfuckin’ thang.” –Big Don (Samuel L. Jackson) in TRUE ROMANCE. It was much funnier back then (despite the use of the P-word, which has always made our skin crawl), before screenwriter Quentin Tarantino started to annoy the shit out of us. In fact, we think the only thing worse than the word “pussy” is the idea of Quentin Tarantino saying the word “pussy.”

5. Maverick (Tom Cruise) in a bar, serenading his flight-school teacher Charlie (Kelly McGillis, with a pink sweater draped over her shoulders) with “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling” in TOP GUN (1986). We know that this scene, co-starring a pre-E.R. Anthony Edwards as Goose, has kind of lost its oomph after so many bad karaoke renditions (not to mention the whole Scientology thing), but take yourself back to the very first time you saw it: pure ’80s magic.

4. Two awesome things happened in 1995, and at the time they were completely unrelated: CLUELESS was released, featuring the unforgettable line by Cher (Alicia Silverstone), “I was surfing the crimson wave. I had to haul ass to the ladies’.” Tony Scott had nothing to do with this film, but he did happen to direct CRIMSON TIDE, which came out the same year (starring Denzel Washington). Which meant that 1995 was an excellent vintage for menstruation euphemisms.

3. Maverick (Tom Cruise) and Charlie (Kelly McGillis) in the women’s bathroom together in TOP GUN (1983). Charlie: “What do you wanna do? Just drop down on the tile and go for it?” Maverick: “No, actually I had this counter in mind.” Charlie: “Great, that would be very, very comfortable, yeah.” Maverick: “It could be.” Not much on paper, perhaps, but we always loved the way this scene turned out… and we like it about a million times more than the actual love scene, which is all “Take My Breath Away” and soft kisses and gauzy white curtains blowing in a gentle night breeze.

2. We’ll just go ahead and say it because we know you’re thinking it: the lesbian sex scene in THE HUNGER (1983) between a centuries-old vampire named Miriam (Catherine Deneuve) and a doctor named Sarah who becomes her victim in all senses of the word (Susan Sarandon). Did we mention that Miriam’s previous lover, whom she had grown tired of, was played by David Bowie? Yeah, TWILIGHT’s hand-holding and swooning has nothing on this.

1. The homoerotic beach volleyball scene in TOP GUN (1983). We may have just suffered through a thousand “accidental” lady butt shots while watching women’s beach volleyball in the Olympics, but we don’t care, because we’ll always have TOP GUN. The suntan-oiled bare chests, the high-fives, the manly hugs, the passion, the sweat, the bonding… aw, yeah. Runner-up homoerotic scene in TOP GUN: the locker room, featuring freshly showered bare chests, skimpy white towels and a whole lot of steam… aw, yeah.


Photo credit: IMDb