If looks could kill — fabulous firearm fashion

Camp darling Mae West was brilliant at declaring the obvious, peppered with a healthy amount of innuendo. But when she first declared “is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?” there wasn’t much room for interpretation. Recently, however, some rather patriotic clothing companies are catering to a burgeoning market of people that want to look less militant, and more everyday casual, as they carry a concealed weapon on the streets. Every culture has its subculture…cue covert fashion.

Clothing companies like Woolrich and Under Armour (quelle apropos) are embracing the rising demand, putting their spin on a trend. Woolrich’s Elite Concealed Carry line boasts hidden pockets so the wearer has quick access to their weapon, either holstered in a secret pocket or resting in the waistline. Of course one concealed weapon is never enough. Some styles have room for multiple firearms.

Under Armour, on the other hand, is embracing the market from its techno fabric perspective. The clothing’s ability to wick away moisture is considered helpful to keep your concealed weapon dry. As most experienced armed persons are aware, if your firearm gets too moist, you’ll rust out. Wickaway technology is a perfect solution. Natch.

According to liberal propaganda rag The New York Times, permits to carry a concealed weapon have increased forty percent since 2008. We’re looking at about seven million citizens walking around strapped, as it were. Though we’re not referring to vintage Alaia or Leger.

Apparel has always been designed to cater to combat. But in light of the country’s current debate over munitions sponsored Stand Your Ground laws, we’re thinking this could get a bit messy. Where pockets on top of pockets, on top of secret pockets, have a person looking comfortable on the battlefield as well as in Walmart, once donned the outfits leave a person boxy looking, and can’t help but evoke the feel of a middle aged couple traveling to a country retreat, in a Subaru Outback. Buffalo check in tow.

The pockets aren’t just for guns, one can hold knives and ammunition cartridges, and a flashlight, should the Rapture interfere with date night. In a post Mae West world, it appears a libidinous quip is superseded by the new rule. Is that a gun in your pocket? Your guess is as good as ours.