Sad Putin vs Sad Obama

I know we’ve got our own ridiculous election to follow, but did you know that Vladimir Putin is, once again, running Russia (although we are pretty sure he never really stopped)? Apparently, securing only 63 percent of Sunday’s vote put a damper on his victory celebration because he had a bit of a cry. Thank goodness the Internet is here to cheer him up! The folks over at Buzzfeed alerted us to the Crying Putin meme. But, guess what? America still owns the web and President Obama isn’t about to let sad Putin steal his thunder. So…who do you think wins the sad-off?

In this corner, wearing the red trunks, we’ve got Vlady-Vlad Putin. He’s a former KGB operative with a black belt in Judo who has shot a tiger (with a tranquilizer gun, but still). He also rules Russia with an iron fist and crushes all opposition, from billionaire oligarchs to street protesters. I’m glad this isn’t an actual boxing match. It’s all very impressive, but when it comes to sadness I’m just not buying it. I don’t think Putin gets sad. I’d imagine at the first inkling of sadness he just punches a subordinate in the face and moves on. Those sure look like crocodile tears to me. Go ahead, prove me wrong by making your own sad Putin.

And in the blue trunks, we’ve got sad Barack Obama of the Cheer Up Obama meme. Hey, nobody said getting elected during an economic crisis and then dealing with a do-nothing Congress was going to be easy. At least the man has the capability to experience joy without shooting animals, imprisoning his rivals or encouraging the Syrian government to murder its own people. Look how easy it is to cheer up Barack:

Plus, cheering up the President feels like fulfilling a patriotic duty. Obama wins! USA! USA!

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