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Breakfast for dinner: Fucking Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Pancakes

Watch Love Lust: Breakfast, Monday, November 28th at 8pm.

Breakfast for dinner is the greatest invention ever (not sliced bread – that horrible idiom only cheapens the magnificence of breakfast for dinner). Some of you, growing fatter by the minute in your sagging, decrepit office chairs as you search online for ways to lose weight and not exercise, may be saying, “Zach, surely you can’t suggest that breakfast for dinner is a greater invention than, say, penicillin?” But I’m saying that. Penicillin smells bad, and if you snort it you just get a headache.

Breakfast for dinner is not only a classy alternative to dinner for dinner, it’s also a wonderful allegory for America. Breakfast for dinner tells the story of choice, freedom, independence, and excessive caloric intake. I’ve never been to a Tea Party event, but after booing gay soldiers, not having any plan for the economy beyond “suring it up and gittering ‘er done,” and making me want to move to Canada, I think a fitting post-rally dinner would be pancakes, bacon or sausage (because choice is quintessentially American) and a nice assortment of muffins and pastries. And they’d wash it all down with freedom juice, which of course, is what the Native Americans called O.J. (The juice, not the amazing running back now famous for all the wrong reasons).

Celebrate America and cook up some fucking Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Pancakes. And buy my book. In fact, if you don’t make the pancakes, we’re still cool, just buy the book.

1 1/4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
3 tbs sugar
2 tsp baking powder
1 1/4 tsp cinnamon
3/4 tsp salt
1 1/3 cups whole milk
3/4 cup canned pure pumpkin
4 large eggs, separated
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted
1 tsp vanilla extract
Chocolate chips, any kind you want, baby
Maple syrup

Combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, salt and patriotic good vibes in a bowl. In another, equally patriotic bowl, combine the milk, pumpkin, egg yolks, melted butter and vanilla. Make two bowls one by combining them, saying “ta-da” for dramatic effect. Whip the egg whites until they’re as stiff as the peaks of the Rocky Mountains and then fold them whites into the batter. Now just make some pancakes and eat them, that’s on you.

Watch Love Lust: Breakfast, Monday, November28th at 8pm.

Zach Golden is the creator of the incredibly popular website,What the Fuck Should I Make For Dinner? Buy his amazing new book right now!