Best of the web: Hear English as your second language and knit a sweater for a pigeon in need

Teenage Mutant Ninja Noses: Who knew that the tip of a human nose looked exactly like the head of a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle? Well, the author of this awesome new time-waster, Teenage Mutant Ninja Noses, certainly did. Best of all, this game isn’t limited to certain human noses…it works on all of them, meaning we can enjoy Raphael and Michaelangelo scribbled on shnozzes forever and ever. The one exception might be Michael Jackson’s nose, which turned out kind of wonky.

Sweaters for Penguins: Knitters, now is your time to shine. Skeinz, a New Zealand-based knitting company, is issuing a worldwide call for “penguin jumpers” to help prevent birds affected by the recent oil spill from losing feathers and ingesting toxic material. Come on, what else do you have to do this weekend? Yarn is cheap, and the website provides detailed instructions for making penguin-size sweaters. Besides, you’ll be contributing to the all-time cutest charitable cause in history.


Skwerl: Warning – this trippy short film by Brian Fairbain will make you think you forgot how to speak English. “Skwerl” is meant to show native speakers what English sounds like to people who don’t understand it.

The Keaton Music Typewriter: File under insanely cool antique gizmos, this extremely rare “music typewriter” recently became available on Etsy, complete with 33 keys of musical notes mounted on a circular board. Produced by Keaton in 1936, the machine was intended for publishers who needed to reproduce large quantities of sheet music in a short amount of time. The device is thought to be one of less than 100 still in existence (hence the $6,000 price tag).

A Duet with Siri: Like ChaCha before her, the iPhone’s voice-activated “personal assistant,” Siri, has inspired a smattering of YouTube videos wherein users try to illicit her goofiest responses (see if you don’t know what I mean). Most of them are gross and/or X-rated, but this little ditty by Jonathan Hamm — made in duet with Siri — is actually kind of charming.