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Top 10 most overrated sex acts

After more than a decade in the sex writing biz, we have seen our share of sexual gimmicks come and go, many of them vastly overrated. Below are the top ten sexual acts that, while they may be more substantial than gimmicks, continue to get more accolades than they deserve. Also, check out the Top 10 Most Underrated Sexual Acts — a.k.a. under-doggie-style — that we’ll feature tomorrow.

  1. Threeways. Too many elbows, too few orgasms. Also, there’s the jealousy, the insecurity, and the awkward post-coital cuddling and/or brunch. ‘Nuff said?
  2. The 69 position. Kind of like communism: great in theory, not in practice.
  3. Simultaneous orgasms. What is that saying, the great is the enemy of the good? Sure, the simultaneous O is awesome when it happens, but individual orgasms are pretty dandy, too. And sometimes, an alternating spotlight is a good idea — especially if that thing that pushes your partner over the edge requires a certain degree of concentration and/or skill.
  4. Female ejaculation & the G-spot. Somewhere along the line, this kind of female climax became valued above all others. Sure, for some women it’s the holy grail, but for others, G-spot attention is just plain annoying, or even painful.
  5. Fast-pumping intercourse. Do we really have to explain this one?
  6. Deep-throating. Because nothing says hot like a woman throwing up a little on your penis.
  7. Sharing ALL your sexual fantasies with your partner. Some things are best saved for your me-time seshes.
  8. Text sex. There just aren’t that many nerve-endings in our thumbs.
  9. Sending naked photos. Oh, posterity. Oh, discretion. Oh, angry ex with a trigger-happy finger on the forward button.
  10. Two tongue kissing. One at a time is underrated, that’s all we’d like to say.

Honorable mention: Using flavored lube; putting on a condom with your mouth

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