The Onion finally comes to TV

This Day In History: The Invention Of The Handjob

Be afraid, Jon Stewart, be very afraid. Last week, the Onion News Network premiered on IFC and artfully accomplished what The Daily Show tries to: mercilessly skewering the 24-7 cable news industry (the subtitle is, after all, “News Without Mercy”). It’s exactly what a fake news show should look like, adopting all the slick, epilepsy-inducing bells and whistles of cable news shows and featuring beautiful, dead-behind-the-eyes presenters (“The Factzone”‘s anchor, Brooke Alvarez, is played pitch perfect — or should we say bitch perfect — by Suzanne Sena, who used to be a Fox News anchor — love it!). ONN doesn’t take on as many current events as The Daily Show, but they don’t have to: the news they make up and deliver deadpan is familiar enough, and scarily so (“Snowy Conditions Proving Hazardous for Nation’s Idiots”). And since this is cable, they take full advantage of their ability to throw a lot of inappropriate sex into the mix: don’t miss their “This Day in History” segment on the invention of the handjob. It’s all online, but you can catch their second TV television episode tomorrow night in their regular Friday-night 10pm/9pmC slot on IFC. (Oh, and they’ve also got a new sports spoof show on Comedy Central, but we’re not going to pretend we SUNfiltered faithful know enough about sports to get the jokes.)