10 worst things to say at your partner's family holiday dinner
photo by Average Jane
- Forget charades, let’s debate the Stupak Amendment!
- So what made you guys decide not to circumcise your son?
- No Brussels sprouts for me, thanks — we’re planning on anal tonight and I don’t want to be gassy.
- Hoo-boy, anyone got a box of matches I could borrow for the bathroom?
- I think it’s so great that you’re comfortable serving canned cranberry sauce.
- Oh, I totally recognize this room from Billy’s first sex tape.
- Hey Schnokum-poopie-face, would you pass the salt?
- Wait, who am I playing footsie with under the table?
- I just read about a study showing that the aroma of pumpkin pie increases blood flow to the penis by 40 percent.
- I’d shake hands, but I just masturbated, sorry.
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